When you learn that the people who clearcut 80 trees and several acres of shrubs at Mar Vista were only slapped on the wrist with a $3,000 fine you get angry.

When you get angry you decide to go swim with the orcas;

When you swim with the orcas you get hyperthermia;

When you get hyperthermia they take you to Peace Health;

When you go to Peace Health you want to die;

When you want to die, at Peace Health, they refuse your end of life request;

When Peace Health won’t let you die you open a Subway sandwich shop on Spring Street;

When you open a Subway on Spring Street islanders run you out of town on a rail;

Don’t get run out of town on a rail. Demand that substantial fines and penalties’ for such egregious violations of shoreline regulations be enacted.

Mike Buettell/San Juan Island